The thing about the dirty cartoon is not that I think people coudln’t handle it.  It’s not porn, of course you guys can handle it.  No, the thing is that I enjoy straddling the line, and I enjoy that the line of taste has definitely moved since I became a web comic, but the line IS still there and this cartoon crossed over.  It just did.  It was unintentional (mostly).  Well, to be perfectly honest, I thought it was one of those cartoons where it could be read either way, but after it was drawn up, it was just in your face filthy and that’s not what I am interested in doing and that’s not what Clear Blue Water is about.

I would send it out in email to interested people, but it would just end up online somewhere and I don’t want that.  Here’s why.  I have a very good friend at church who recently told me something that really changed my thinking.  Basically, her point was this…  Suppose Jesus was sitting in a chair right beside my light table shooting the breeze with me while I cartooned.   Would I have written this cartoon, drawn it up and posted it under His watchful eye?  Um, NO.  I wouldn’t.  And He IS watching me and I AM a Christian and I don’t want to publish things that make me uncomfortable or that go against my faith.  I have pushed this limit lately, and I am feeling uncomfortable with it.  My epiphany was that I need to walk the walk.  If no one can tell by my actions how much I love the Lord and how important my faith is to me, then I have failed.

One good thing has come from this.  I HAVE worked out what my real goal is with this strip.  I want to publish a comic strip that I am proud of and that God can be proud of.  For the most part, I think I have.  This particular cartoon was a misstep, but I won’t compound the problem by posting it or sending it around.  I didn’t post this to whet people’s appetites (because I know I would be very curious too, if the shoe were on the other foot) or to anger people.  I made a mistake.  I will write another cartoon to replace this one and post it soon. 

I made the mistake of writing it, then the mistake of posting half of it, and then the mistake of telling people I had done this.  My fault entirely.  Please forgive me.  Won’t happen again.  (hopefully…)

Oh, by the way, I do not intend to become a different sort of comic strip, nor do I intend to change my focus.  I have been a Christian for the entire run of CBW and I try hard to balance my faith with pushing boundaries and challenging people’s thinking.  This is a hard line to straddle, and I have fallen to one side or the other frequently, but I keep trying.  I am not changing, just making sure that I keep God (my most important first reader) upper most in my mind when doing this strip.

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